Fuck.

I have been discussing my Mums lymphedema with her and the district nurse that comes to dress her legs. It cropped up in conversation as I am sure I have heard mentioned before that lymphedema can be hereditary. I have just been researching further what the likelyhood of such things actually are and came across a site that told me everything I wanted to know. It turns out that like diabetes there are two kinds of lymphedema that you can have - one being one got from damadge or trauma to a lymphatic gland, the other something that you are born with after having an abnormality in one of you gene alleles. Here is what I read:

"Lymphedema is the swelling, usually of an extremity, resulting from poor drainage of fluid out of the body's tissues. There are two types of lymphedema. Although the cause is not well understood, primary lymphedema is thought to result from an inherited abnormality of the lymphatic system. Secondary lymphedema is the result of a damaged or blocked lymphatic system caused by traumas such as surgery or injury.

Primary lymphedema has been estimated to occur in about one in six thousand people, more often in females than in males (Dale, 1985). Age of onset tends to be similar within families. Primary lymphedema can be present from birth (congenital lymphedema), symptoms can begin at the time of puberty (lymphedema praecox), or onset can occur in adulthood (lymphedema tarda) (Lewis and Wald, 1984).

Primary lymphedema seems to be inherited in several different ways. Milroy's and Meige's Disease are two forms of primary lymphedema that tend to show swelling below the waist and are dominantly inherited in some families. Milroy's Disease (congenital lyphedema) is characterized by swelling present from around the time of birth. Meige Disease, also known as lymphedema praecox, may appear suddenly around the time of puberty (Wheeler et al., 1981). When the first signs of swelling appear after age 35, this condition is called lymphedema tarda. A recessive form of lymphedema has also been described, as well as lymphedema in association with other traits.

Except for genes on the sex chromosomes, both men and women have two copies of each gene. If only one changed copy of a gene causes a condition, the condition will be inherited in what is called a dominant pattern. If an individual has a dominant condition such as Milroy's or Meige's Disease, the chance of passing the gene to a child is 1 in 2 or 50% with each pregnancy. These odds are the same as getting "heads" in a coin toss.

Dominant disorders are ones that run from generation to generation or are passed along through the family. If a person has the gene for a dominant form of primary lymphedema, there is usually a 50% or 1 in 2 chance of passing that gene on to his or her children. However, not everyone with the gene for this form of lymphedema will actually develop symptoms. Therefore, even if a child does not inherit lymphedema from a parent, he or she may still have inherited the gene and pass the gene that causes lymphedema on to a child. Although we do not yet understand why this "reduced penetrance" sometimes occurs, it is more common in men. In other words, a brother would be less likely than his sister to have symptoms of lymphedema even if they both inherit the same lymphedema gene."

My Mum always had big legs but her condition only really became apparent when she got cellulitus in 1997 and was hospitalised for about 6 weeks. Ever since she has worn compression stockings to help her fluids circulate and not accumulate in her legs. She does appear to have primary lymphadema so I should in theory have a 50% chance of having the gene and a reasonable chance of developing it later in life.

The conversation cropped up after I noted that I have always had chunky legs for no particular reason. I mean I have always packed some and so should have fairly chunky legs. Nevertheless they do seem on the borderline of being disproportionately big for my body fat levels. It is hard to tell really but I have some hellish cankles when my arms are (if I can be immodest) pretty honed and toned. Hmm. I guess I cant really get anything from the anlysis of my legs as there are too many other possibilities such as the fact that my dad has really unusual legs that are bith muscular and really really wide on his lower leg compared to the top. I do of course also have a bit a heffer meat on me in some place lol. Bleh.

I am not going to worry about it as firstly I am still young enough to think I am invincible and secondly because I am always in denoal over these things hehe!

Anyhoo.

You may have noticed that my blog looks a little different and has had some additions. This is because I am now using blogger beta [shameless plug] that is really very good. I can now edit things and add things without screwing up the whole page because I know next to nothing about HTML. I particularly like the new black/silver/red/gold colour theme [see my previous posts about my colour fixation]. There wasnt actually going to be any gold but for some reason the background of my blog title turned that colour and I couldmt for the life of the find the HTML to change it so figured I would compensate by including it in other places too to make it look purposeful!

I tried to look all over to find some cool stuff to stick in my sidebar. So far all I have is a poll that I will change from time to time and a place where I will put a picture of the moment that describes my current place in my life.

I have decided that I should really take care of this blog as it has (rather surprisingly) become a complete success. Not in readership obviously! I mean only Mike and occasionally a person from myspace reads it, but then that wasnt really the reason for me creating it. In fact there wasnt any specific reason for creating this little corner of the net. I was just inquisitive one day to look at these newfangled blog things that everybody seemed to be talking about. It seemed rather exciting to peer into the lives of random people across the globe as they poured themsleves into these little pages or at least left enough brain fluff residue for me to pretentiously contemplate their personalities.

In the end the big "create your own blog" button proved too tempting and I just did it to have a fiddle. I played with the scheme and picked this lovely black one and then wrote my first tentative post, not really knowing what the hell I would talk about or what the point really was. I figured that on online diary would be kindof cool. Maybe I could have a little talk to myself and keep a record of it at the same time rather than talking at the bathroom mirror in times of contemplation and frustration.

As time went on I began to surpirse even myself with the fact that I hadnt got bored yet and that I could easily spend hours just writing my thoughts down. From there it just continued and now here I am writing my 60 somethingth post in about 10 months. Woo!

I really think I should treaure this little space and take care of it so I can look at it in the future. I suppose this is a bit of a record of my life and struggle to grow up and become the person I am going to be for the rest of my life. I have already grown up so much in the past year or so. Can you imagine what it would be like if I was still posting in a few years? Wow! I really hope I dont lose interest and that I can keep this up for many years to come or at least until some rich white man buys the internet and starts charging. Lets face it, unless incredibly Karl Marx was somehow right and there will be a revolution against capitalism, one day somebody is going to find a way to buy this thing. It happened with TV remember!

In other news I have just aquired a Russian E-penfriend called Albina who seems pretty cool and pretty genuine. She loves Muse and Radiohead and paints. We clearly have plenty to talk about! She lives in Ufa in western Russia which I looked up on google Earth before proceeding to blow my mind by zooming so far in on m house I could see my Mum hanging out washing. Yeah it sounds a bit odd but dont you find it wierd that anybody in the world can zoom in to your house and see the exact point in your house where you are sitting? I just sat boggle eyed at the computer going "Oh my god I am sat there now!" Pointing to an area in the roof which was currently above my head.

Perhaps that is all I have to say right now. I think so anyway...
I was about to end on a joke but realised I couldnt think of any really good ones at the moment so instead I will quote a little from "Little Miss Jocelyn" which I am really starting to find hilarious:

MAN: Get on with it!
WOMAN: I am all ready for a funeral! I am already wearing black! All I need now is somebody DEAD! Now who wants to die!!?
MAN: *looks afraid*
WOMAN: [to job centre worker] Could you tell me what else you got?
JCW: Well I am afraid we really arent going to be able to find you anything that doesnt involve people.
WOMAN: Oh I dont mind so long as it doesnt involve my Linford....
JCW: I am sure that will be no problem.
WOMAN: What was that?
JCW: I just said that I dont think that will be a problem [smiles]
WOMAN: Oh I thought you just said that I should cut off his toes and sew them up his spine to remind him of the godzilla lizard that he is!